My Confidence-Boosting Mantra

About a month ago during one of our sessions, my therapist told me that one thing I can do to work through my anxiety – in addition to grounding techniques – is this: Choose a mantra! The last time I chose a mantra for myself, I was going through a deep depression following a manic episode. As I was cleaning out my closet a few months ago, I came across an old sheet of paper on which I had written a list of words that described the way I felt about myself at that time. Among these words was worthless. During those dark times, I had to always remind myself that I am enough. I even got the word “enough” tattooed on my wrist. Every time I look at it, I am reminded not only of how I struggled mentally and emotionally but also of how I have overcome.

But the fight is not over; there’s always going to be another mountain. My therapist explained to me that one can have mantras for different seasons in his/her life. I have been experiencing anxiety associated with my new job as a student ultrasound tech because I am not a confident scanner. I know the exam protocols and what I am looking for, but I lack the skills necessary to capture representative images. For this season of challenging myself and honing my scanning skills, I decided to give the mantra a try. If I am feeling anxious prior to scanning, I have a talk with myself that consists of repeating the phrase, “She believed she could, so she did.” Even as I am scanning, I will say those words to myself. It helps to center me and keep me from getting frustrated, especially with the not-so-easy scans and/or patients.

In just a month, I can honestly say that things are improving! I was and am not the best scanner, but my confidence has received a boost. An ultrasound tech at one of my clinical sites last semester told me that I have to have false confidence starting out. Sort of a “fake it ’til you make it” attitude. And she’s right! Even if my confidence isn’t legitimate, it still helps tremendously to believe in myself. I have noticed that the techs I work with are entrusting me with more. For example, there have been several times when I have scanned patients without them watching me. They know that I know what I am doing, even if I have to struggle some to get my images. It has gotten to the point now that with some scans, I will take all the pictures, and they will just review/critique them and scan behind me to make sure I did not miss anything since I am still a student. If they can believe in me, why can’t I believe in myself?

What are you going through in your life right now? Is there a mantra you can say to yourself to help you make it through? It’s worth a try!

Signed,

Lai